Can you still have a third child? 10x your experiences

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We recently wrote an article about the fact that many people say that you can still have a third child. We wondered whether that was correct and did some research. This article received no fewer than 400 responses from our readers.

We share some of the responses with you.

Third child

In the article we looked at the care tasks that come with it, the financial picture and any changes in the working life of the parents. These are issues that apply to having a third child. Of course, the experience with a third child is different and very personal for every parent.

We also noticed this when we shared this article on Facebook. More than 400 readers have had their own experiences with a third child (and some more) and shared their thoughts with us. We found this interesting to read and would like to share their responses with you.

Readers’ experiences

Below are a number of responses from readers about their experiences with a third child.

Katrien – “We have had four kids here in four and a half years and I would do it again. From one child to two children was the biggest adjustment, I thought. The more kids we had, the more relaxed I became. They have a lot in common.”

Evy – “I have three boys. That combination alone. I wouldn’t want to miss them anymore, but I wouldn’t choose them again either. There is a child with disabilities and the youngest also has his problems. A package that carries weight. You have to be on your feet to combine everything when you work almost full-time.”

Truus – “It is more expensive, but a third teaches you to let go and have less control. It is often cozy in the house, there are always friends at home. Now they are three teenagers, which is quite busy and sometimes you think: ‘Grrr…’ But it is also very pleasant, there is always a hustle and bustle in the house.”

Natasja – “There is no general rule for that, is there? No matter how sweet they are, one child is simply much busier or needs more care than the other. And one house has more space than the other. One job pays more than the other or is easier to combine with the children. For one parent, multitasking simply comes easier. Totally fine, right? As long as it has been carefully thought through. Unfortunately, I often see that parents first have another child and only then think about how expensive or busy it is.”

Ashley – “I thought it all had its own gradation of spiciness: from none to one child, from one to two and from two to three. From two to three was tough, but you learn to deal with it sincerely. As parents, we must give ourselves time to deal with the new situations. I couldn’t imagine living without my three kids.”

Jeanine – “I was so happy with my third unplanned pregnancy. As an only child, I hoped for a family with four children. There are three, but I now also have six grandchildren. Usually that is really enjoyable.”

Naomi – “The third brought the hustle and chaos into our house, making it feel like a big family. Our table is full and there is always a sweet arrival from friends. I thought it made a huge difference, two or three children. It also matters how much age difference there is between the kids. Our eldest was 3.5 years old when the third was born, so you have three very young children who you have to help with everything. It’s super fun, there’s always someone to play with. Our third is the icing on the cake, we always say.”

AnneMarie – “The family dynamic was and is the biggest challenge. We had a lot to deal with with three fanatical, temperamental girls. I’m glad there are three girls, but for the dynamics a mix would have been better. And now that they are teenagers, it is indeed becoming even more expensive. But it is becoming increasingly cozy at home now that the tropical years are behind us.”

Sanne – “I have three boys. I continue to find going from zero to one the most difficult. You have no idea how much of your free time you will have to give up for the first one and what awaits you. I found it easiest to go from one to two. You already know somewhat what to expect. Just learning to divide your attention between the two kids takes some getting used to, but that’s about it if you ask me.

We now have a baby who is almost four months old and yes, it is busy and you have to divide your attention even more. But I also notice that we have become easier and more relaxed with each child. Everything no longer has to be so strict, you let go a little more and you no longer worry about everything. Three boys is a busy, but very fun bunch! Apart from those sometimes too busy showers, we think it’s really doable. Also financially. And it just fits three in the backseat of the car.”

Diana – “I think everyone should just do what feels good, but in these times it is also important to look at what you can do as a family. Especially if you want the kids to be able to study.”